A dangerously incomplete archive of all the quotes given to us by our fellow students at KAs School/College/Concentration Camp, now with a spangly new layout to cope with all the new content, designed for maximum audience pleasure. Yey. Got more? Don't be a turnip! Submit em!
Quotes are sorted in..err..absolutely no order at all. They are catalogued with author, sometimes where it happened, and of course the quote itself. This page has excessive use of the word cunt - so if you don't want to read this word, don't read on... oh. Too late.
- Luke walks into a Government and Politics Lesson -
>Luke: Sorry I'm late.. wait a minute, you're not in my class!
...
>Luke: Oh shit! This isn't English.
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>Phil: Just shove it in and squirt...twice!
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An art lesson, with the crazy welsh teacher Mr. Evans:
>Neil: PHIL!! Blow in this powder paint as hard as you can, I just did!
- Phil blows in the paint. A multi-coloured cloud moves across the room, aswell as making Phil a walking rainbow -
>Tom: Hahaha, let's get him wet now! Pass me the sponge!
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Billy is messing around at the back of a lesson, nothing new here then:
>Mrs. Jones: Say, who is that curly haired fellow at the back?
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Messing with Mrs. Raffell and the overhead projector:
>Tommy: Let's block it up, so next time the bitch tries to work it, no light will come out!
(Opens projector, and shoves wad of paper over the HALOGEN bulb, and turns it on to test). Smoke fills the room as the paper catches fire, and the room empties quicker than ever.
>Tommy: Oops.
- After mixing chemicals from several experiments together to 'see what happens', we stumble upon a bit of bother. The mixture starts to violently bubble, hiss, and give off yellow steam (Sulphur Dioxide apparently - and holy shit did it smell), so we do the Christian thing, and dump the evidence. 3 times that is.
>(5 Minutes Later) Dan: Shit. Errr... Miss! The bin is on fire!
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It's noisy in the library again, and Liz the librarian appears to set us straight:
>Liz : OK, you're not working, you're talking..(looks at Rory)..and you're fat.
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MSN Messenger Quote:
>Noz: lol im not the only 1 finding revision hard..
>Noz: bens having 'trouble with triangles'.
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Scenario - Phil has yoghurt on his shoes (teehee):
>Phil's Mum: You know Phil. From this angle, and in this light...the stain on your shoes looks very much like semen...
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>Dr. Pell: Actually Philip, male moisturising is very important!
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>Phil's Dad (To Phil): You are a limp wristed clown.
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>Neil: Yo Chris, would you rather have a night with beeeeaaauutifal woman, or play with some magnets?
>Chris (Totally Serious): Hm. Magnets, of course.
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>Miss Reid (The RE Teacher, to Tom): Put that away. I don't want you listening to music in my class, especially not if its MICHAEL JACKSON.
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>Neil: Hey, have you guys heard that new song by MC Hawking? It's called 'All my shootings be drive-bys'?
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>Neil: What's that smell? Oh. Tom, your work is on fire.
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>Neil: Henry cunt is spelt with a C.
>Henry: Shut up, no it's not it's a fucking K.
>Neil: It's a C idiot, it's my favourite word remember.
>Henry: It's a K, dumbass.
>Mrs. Becklea: It's a C. Can we do some work now?
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>MSN Messenger Quote:
"Dan says:
I just signed phil up for the michael jackson newsletter!"
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>Phil (During Sex education lesson): Damn..guess that means I'm below average.
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>Neil: So Phil. If you had to have your Mum or your Sister, who would it be?
>Phil (Without Pause): My Mum definitely.
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>Dan: Phil, do you prefer old people or children? ~Grins~
>Phil: Err..old people I guess...
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